Broccoli and cheese soup

So I love soup for those of you who don't know me. I can eat it for any meal (maybe pushing it for breakfast) but I pretty much eat it all the time...that along with a good nice made sandwich is a gourmet meal to me! So today I tried and make one of my favorite soups from scratch today. Here are the ingredients:

1/2 medium onion chopped
1/4 cup melted butter
1/4 cup flour
2 cups half and half
2 cups chicken stock
1/2 pound fresh broccoli
1 cup carrots
1/4 teaspoon of salt
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon pepper
8 ounces grated cheese

Directions 

-Saute onions in a little butter in a small sauce pan (set aside) 

-In a large stock pot, slowly add half and half mixing the entire time

-Melt butter and add flour and mix for three minutes.

-Slowly add chicken stock mixing the entire time.

-Let simmer on low for about 20 minutes

-Add broccoli, carrots, onions and cook on low for 25 min.

-Season with salt, pepper and nutmeg

-Place soup in a blender or use an immersion blender and puree 

-Heat over low heat and add cheese, mix until melted 

For this recipe I've read that some people thought the nutmeg and pepper were a little too over powering and I would have to agree. My soup came out thick but not as thick as I would have liked. Next time I think I will skip over the nutmeg, use only a pinch of pepper and add some garlic to it instead. For the thickness, I read that before letting the initial broth simmer for 20 min, you should let it come to a boil and get nice and thick ( I feel the flour is what makes it that way) But anyway on the whole, this soup came out pretty well for me. I will be trying it again and seeing if I can't improve on anything I messed up on the first time =) 

Feelings..as of now

Today I went to buy a suit with my mom for my upcoming interview. After deciding on what to get I tried to present my lesson to my sister and mom today. For some reason I couldn't really enthuse myself and gain the courage to present in the way I know that I should to get the job. It's like I'm holding my own self back from being what I know I can be.

I did get through the presentation though and took the feedback from my mom and sister. I just wish I could get out of this shy period in my life and just break out of my shell. It's just like something in my mind is holding me back. I hope I'm able to gain enough courage to really deliver on the 13th and get a call back.

That being said, today I looked online to see what other people in my situation (BA in Japanese) were doing. Of course I found the JET program and teaching English in Japan to be the number one choice but some of the results I found and what people were saying about language majors really shocked and depressed me. Some said that a BA in Japanese was totally useless, or that you should couple it with something else to try and get your "real career" on track. When I look at myself, I had changed my major from French to Japanese, and I never really had an interest in business or finance... foreign policy or politics to really concentrate on any of them. I had liked studying Japanese...and although it became and still is a little overwhelming at times, I do still like to learn about the language. I feel that I don't really have a real career path that a BA could have started my life on. I don't regret my decision to major in Japanese...because it was pretty much the only thing that I had that much of a passion for to study and read about. Everything else just seemed like a chore with no means to an end.

I think about my debt and would it have changed or gotten less massive if I hadn't majored in Japanese...and to tell the truth it probably would be, but I wouldn't have been able to experience everything I had up until now if I hadn't transferred. I wouldn't have been able to go to ICU, I wouldn't have been able to get my Japanese to a N2 level proficiency and I wouldn't have met the love of my life. Even though I made a mistake and hadn't borrowed as smart as I should have, I'm glad I was able to experience what I did. I wouldn't be the person I am at this moment if I hadn't went through those experiences, so I don't regret my decision. There are days when I feel like I'm going to break down but in those times, by boyfriend and my family raise my spirits back up and help me through the hard times. I am so blessed to have them.

My dad, when he was young had us and my mom to take care of. He would go to school and have dead end jobs working at a factory, Sears and other places just to get by. I remember him waiting at the bus stop everyday because he didn't even have a car. He had two children to take care of, working on a degree and yes loans to pay off too. He didn't roll over and die though. He kept pulling through and to this day it's made him what he his today. Adversity brings out the character in all of us. Looking at my situation now, I just have to fight like my dad did. I have to continue on. This is what I chose and this is what I have to deal with right now. If my dad can do it with two kids and a third on the way and overcome all of that to get to where he is, then I can get through what I'm going through right now and come out even stronger. I'm glad I talked to my dad today. He really motivates me to move ahead and I love him.

Debt Reduction

So...I graduated from Georgetown this May and have been trying to find a job in the US pertaining to my major. Something related to Japanese studies where I can improve my language skills. However, America isn't the most lucrative place for this and with the current job market, I can't say that it will be an easy task of finding something at this point...however time is not on my side financially. After I graduated from Georgetown, I have over 100K worth of student loans to pay off. I have monthly bills that combined reach a little over $1000 a month and they start coming next month. Luckily I have a dad that is willing to carry the burden (hopefully) until I land a job and I am so blessed because some people don't even have parents to help them during times such as this. I'm really grateful for that.

My boyfriend however has found a job and starts working next month. He had his grandmother to pay for his tuition and everything so he is one of the lucky few to exit college debt free. In some ways I'm jealous of that but I'm not going to feel remorse for something I can never obtain. This is my situation and it could be worse. Even though my boyfriend was lucky enough to escape the woes of debt, his family is overbearing and very controlling. They don't want him to date and we're pretty much sneaking behind there back to be able to be together. When I look at how he has to live, I do feel better I have parents like mine. I don't feel constricted and although they didn't have the money like his family does, I do have the freedom that he doesn't.

Although you can say this freedom is hindered in a way because of my debt and you may be right. There are a lot of things I can't do because of this debt but I try to find ways around it. Right now I have an interview to teach English in Japan. If this works out I will have the chance to live in Japan again, be immersed in the language and live under a financially strict budget to try and reduce this massive debt. I hope that by the time I leave, I will have eliminated all the government funded debt that I had accrued throughout my school career and just have my private loans to deal with when I come back. However, the one thing that scares me the most is the loan I took out with discover that makes up around half of the debt that I owe. Trying to knock that out will be a challenge but I feel that with my families support and my own financial dictatorship I will be able to get out of debt by the age of 30. Although this seems like a long stretch to be able to try and pay off 100K in seven years time, I think if obedient to my plan I've created and given the right work opportunities I can pull it off.

As depressing as it may seem to be this much in debt and only have earned a Bachelor's degree, I feel that there are things I could have done differently to try and make my loan choices better, however what's done is done and this is my situation I dug myself into. I'm not proud of it but I feel I will pull myself out of it.